“Fifteen minutes, every day, you and me.” This is what I say to my 11-year-old daughter every day right now. The middle school years are tough in so many ways. She is needing a little more one-on-one time and attention with mom.
Fifteen minutes (minimum) for a walk, bike ride, girl chat time, listening, hot cocoa, snuggles … whatever she wants to do … is what gives her that feeling of connection, caring and safety. It keeps our lines of communication open, gives her a safe place to share what is happening in her world, builds her self-esteem, and deepens our mother-daughter bond. All of these enhance the trust we have been building over the years; the trust that will be invaluable when she is a teenager. Do you have a middle school child? Are you aware of his/her emotional needs? Are those needs being met?
Here are just a few signs that your child may have a need they have not yet shared with you:
- Smiling less than usual (may be depressed or less happy for various reasons)
- Eating more and/or gaining weight
- Loss of appetite and/or losing weight
- You can tell s/he wants to speak with you, but they don’t know exactly what to say (reaching out for help)
- Trouble with friends at school, or feeling alienated (no true friends)
- Boredom
- Struggling academically or in extracurricular activities
- Irritable
- Stressed
- Overwhelmed
- Emotional
These are just a few things to look for. You know your child best, and intuition (that gut feeling) is a great way to know if your child is in need of something. They don’t always know to ask, or even have a sense of what it would be. Just start the conversation. I would be happy to show you how. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation here!